The House They Built.

Before the lands were riddled with metal and lights, a man and a woman built a house. It was in the heart of the warm months, and the nights were so clear that they merely crafted their four walls of bundled sticks and left the roof open to the stars. Building their house was incredibly easy – effortless almost – and their first months were filled with smiles and freedom, tangled on their floor laughing and whispering into the early morning light.

Then one day, a storm rolled over the mountains. Giant, grey clouds glowed bright with lightning and it’s anger shook the ground. The man and the woman trembled in the downpour, filled with fear and uncertainty about the future. Their house was flattened in the storm.

After much deliberation, they decided to build another house. This time, they would build it closer to the valley walls for protection. The woman was delighted by having the river to look out on, and they soon found excitement in building their new home. The man would return dripping with sweat, exhausted from chopping trees. The woman worked tirelessly to help clear the ground for their new home and to gather food and cook for them each night. Together, their hands created four thick, oak walls and a sturdy roof. The hours of labor and frustration and failures were dwarfed by the feeling of gratification that overwhelmed them as they slept in their warm house through the winter months. Blankets of snow and screaming winds raged outside, but they spent their nights singing old songs and playing cards in the light of their fireplace.

Then the snow melted, and the peaceful river became an angry, raging force of nature. It ripped trees from it’s banks and cut at the soil. The man and the woman watched, broken hearted, as pieces of their house were torn apart and swept away in the flood.

The man and the woman were devastated, and the storms continued to relentlessly pour over them. The man and the woman cried many tears. They both considered what to do next: try again and face another failure or depart on separate paths.

After many nights, they finally made a decision. They left the valley. The soles of their feet cracked and callused walking the mountain ridges. When they finally arrived, their tired eyes looked to each other and lips moved. They turned their backs on each other, and the man marched into the trees to find the best trees and the woman began clearing the spot they had chosen. They learned from their previous mistakes. They built their walls stronger this time. The man built the porch the woman had always wished for. The woman created a mud mortar to seal the cracks in the walls to prevent the wind whistling that had frustrated the man before. The man and the woman worked on the house for months.

Finally, the house was finished. The man and the woman were much older now, and their long talks had become clipped by familiarity. Smile lines had been etched into their faces, along with the worry lines. The man and the woman laid down for the first time in their new house. The man’s rough hands gently wrapped around the woman, and the same whisper brought the same laugh. The same familiar heart beat skipped inside their ribcages, and they fell asleep within the sturdy walls of their new, safe home.

The years passed,

and the seasons came and went,

but the storms never shook the home the man and the woman built again.

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Splinter.

You are a biologic carcinogen.

You left splinters under my skin. They don’t hurt most of the time, but when I run my fingers over their grooves they still send electric shocks through my ribcage.

You buried roots in my coronary vessels. I get angina at the mention of your name or the thought of you and it drops a weight on my chest and it feels like I can’t breathe.

You spread hematogenously.  I can feel your metastases weighing down my bones and crowding out the marrow cavities. They ache a lot at night.

You left a scar. It’s small, barely noticeable by anyone. Like a plump nodule hiding behind a clavicle, quietly heralding systemic disease.

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Love Changes You.

Love stops you and makes you take a long, hard look at yourself.

Love is kind and patient with you while you try to figure out your flaws and your weaknesses. They sit back with calm and encouraging words, while you fumble through the knots of your past and try to smoothen out the grooves of old habits. Love doesn’t accuse and ridicule your faults. Love simply unveils them and smiles, like a secret shared between two close friends, wanting to explore further.

Love fans your flame.

Love doesn’t shy away from your terrifyingly enormous goals – they jump on the train with you. Love sees your passion and isn’t afraid to ignite it, because love has it’s own passion as well. They see the obstacles that chasing your dreams will entail, and they grab tighter and run with you towards it. Love stares in the face of your biggest challenge, looks at you and says, “Let’s make it your biggest strength.”.

Love sees you.

Love listens to you. Not the kind of listening where the sound pours in one ear and out the other. Love closes the other eardrum, letting your words seep in and wanting to know more. Love sees your weirdness and intensifies it. They speak your secret language, smile while you collect traveling marbles from the mountain, and listen as you belt out your favorite song.

Love is better than you imagined.

If you find yourself thinking, “Is this love?”. Let me assure you, it’s not. When you meet Love, you know it without a shadow of a doubt. Love keeps you up laughing into the early hours of the morning. Love notices the effort you make and makes that effort in return, by surprising you with dinner or showing up when you need them. Being with Love is like waking up on Christmas morning every day of the week. Love infuses you like a balloon – making you feel light, like you’re going to burst with happiness. Love turns you into someone you don’t even recognize – someone who is more kind, more trusting, more confident, more caring than you ever thought you could be. Before Love, relationships made you question yourself. But being with Love makes you realize that you are actually very good at the things you questioned in yourself before – like communicating and being able to make Love happy.

Love changes you into someone you always wanted to be.

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Steel Wire Cutter.

“Does it feel heavy or light?”

 

Life is nothing but a chain of decisions, both conscious and unconscious choices, leading you through a tangle of events. These subtle decisions carry you on until you find yourself startled by your surroundings, wondering how you could have possibly arrived in such discord in the first place.

 

At every fork in this knotted path, there is an instantaneous moment of verdict. We are blessed with an inner compass, guiding us through these unfamiliar, bewildering surroundings: our intuition. Our twisting intestines tell us which path will lead us into darker troubles, and which path will lead to growth and fulfillment.

 

One explicit decision influences every future opportunity on your path.

 

Is your decision closing doors ahead of you, or opening them? Are you spending your life loving the wrong person? Are you choosing happiness? For every decision you encounter throughout your life, answer it based off the question:

 

 

“Does it feel heavy or light?”

 

 

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Your Budding Truths.

Every syllable stems from a seed.

Every word that emerges from your mouth can be linked to some convoluted fissure in your brain, whether you realize it or not. Actions, memories, lessons, realizations – they are all tossed into these troughs to bury their roots and begin sprouting. Sometimes you can mask this hidden garden during conversation, but eventually, if someone listens long enough they will begin to see short, fleeting glances into the origin of your words.

It is impossible to misspeak, when you really think about it. Those words simply poured out of your mouth, directly from the seeds they were born from, and you did not react quickly enough to brush them away.

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Oh, Sky Horses.

Last night I saw a blazing stallion

Running through the fields of Babylon

His dark mane on fire

Singing of a spiritual empire

I have learned not to settle. I have learned to cut things immediately when needed, instead of my former habit of dragging it out, thinking it might go somewhere. Now, when I see red flags, I take action. I know what I want.

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